How to Write Emotions: A Beginner’s Guide to Showing, Not Telling

If you’re a beginner author, you’ve probably heard the advice: “Show, don’t tell.” Nowhere is this more important than when writing emotions. Readers don’t want to be told that a character is sad, angry, or in love—they want to feel it. Done well, emotional writing draws readers into the story and makes characters unforgettable. Done poorly, it can feel flat, forced, or even melodramatic.

In this article, we’ll look at:

• Why writing emotions matters

• The difference between showing and telling

• Examples of good vs. bad emotional writing

• Authors who excel at writing emotions (and those who don’t)

• Practical tips to strengthen your own writing

Why Writing Emotions Matters

At its core, fiction is about connection. Readers don’t care about plot twists if they don’t care about the people involved. Emotions are the bridge between your characters and your readers. When you write emotions effectively, readers root for your characters, share in their struggles, and remember them long after the book is closed.

Show vs. Tell in Emotional Writing

Telling: You state the emotion directly.

Sarah was sad.

Showing: You describe the physical reactions, thoughts, or actions that reveal the emotion.

Sarah’s shoulders slumped as she traced the rim of her untouched coffee cup. Her eyes blurred the letters on the café menu, though she’d read them a hundred times before.

The second version shows sadness through body language and behavior, allowing the reader to feel it rather than being told what to think.

Examples of Good vs. Bad Emotional Writing

Bad Example (Telling):

John was furious. He couldn’t believe what had happened, and he was very angry about it.

Better Example (Showing):

John’s fists clenched until his knuckles whitened. Heat surged through his chest, and his voice cracked when he spoke, louder than he intended.

Here, the reader doesn’t need to be told John is angry—it’s clear through physical description.

Bad Example (Overwriting):

Tears cascaded down her cheeks like waterfalls, her broken heart shattering into a million tiny pieces, as if the universe itself were conspiring against her soul.

Better Example (Balanced Showing):

She bit her lip hard, willing herself not to cry, but the tears slipped through anyway.

Too much purple prose can feel melodramatic. Strong emotional writing is often simple, subtle, and restrained.

Authors Who Excel at Writing Emotions

• Toni Morrison – Her prose often blends sensory detail and emotional truth seamlessly. In Beloved, she evokes grief and memory in ways that are both visceral and haunting.

• Kazuo Ishiguro – Known for restraint, Ishiguro allows emotions to surface gradually, as in The Remains of the Day, where longing and regret are felt through silence as much as words.

• George R.R. Martin – Whatever your view on dragons, his characters’ emotions (fear, rage, betrayal) often drive the plot more powerfully than any battle.

Authors Who Struggle with Emotions

Every writer has strengths and weaknesses, and even greats sometimes falter. For instance:

• Dan Brown – Brilliant with pacing and puzzles, but his characters’ emotions can feel flat or mechanical. Readers are often told how they feel rather than shown.

• E.L. James – While her Fifty Shades series has its audience, much of the emotional writing relies on clichés and over-explanation rather than nuanced showing.

The lesson? Even bestselling authors sometimes get emotions wrong—but you can learn from both successes and shortcomings.

Practical Tips for Writing Emotions

1. Use the Body: Physical reactions—tightened jaws, racing hearts, trembling hands—can reveal more than adjectives.

2. Tap Into the Senses: Smells, textures, and sounds can evoke emotions subtly.

3. Less Is More: Often, understatement is more powerful than overwriting.

4. Context Matters: Don’t just show how your character feels—show why. Let emotion arise naturally from events.

5. Read Aloud: If your emotional scene sounds cheesy when spoken, it probably needs refining.

Final Thoughts

Writing emotions is one of the hardest skills for beginner authors—but it’s also one of the most rewarding. If you master showing instead of telling, your readers will feel with your characters, not just observe them.

Like all writing skills, this takes practice. Study authors who handle emotions well, notice when a book moves you (and how), and don’t be afraid to revise. Strong emotional writing is often the difference between a forgettable story and one that stays with readers for life.